


Wasted

by girl_next_door_writes



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2018-12-05
Packaged: 2019-09-12 06:55:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16868236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/girl_next_door_writes/pseuds/girl_next_door_writes
Summary: You gave up everything for your happy ever after but what if your true happiness is sat drinking himself into oblivion in a bunker?





	Wasted

Sometimes the life you thought you wanted, the one you gave everything up for, it’s not the happily ever after you had hoped for. Two years ago, when you left your old life behind for that apple pie life with Chris, you’d thought this was it. Turns out you weren’t cut out for the fairy tale. There was something missing and you knew exactly what, or rather who, it was. Standing at the back door you tried to make it fast. Chris didn’t deserve this and you felt the warm tears trail down your face as your hand rested on the door handle, your old hold all over your shoulder. The silence was deafening as you turned to look at him sat slumped over the table. “Sometimes love slips away and… and you just can’t get it back.” The explanation sounded hollow but it was the best you had. For one split second you almost turned around, made your way over to the table and wrapped your arms around him, promising to give it yet another one last try, but you already knew that would lead right back here. Better to leave now and give you both time to move on rather than wasting time on something that would never quite fit. You turned the handle and opened the door, taking a deep breath, you took another step and made your way out, walking away from the white picket fence and back into the darkness. You didn’t want to wake up one day and find you’d let the years go by, wasted your time, your heart still with him and your old life.

The quiet of the bunker was getting to him. Sitting at the kitchen table he stared at the glass of whiskey in his hand, it didn’t matter how many glasses he had, how many bottles lay empty, it didn’t kill the pain. Getting to his feet he shuffled across the room and poured the amber liquid into the sink, watching as it swirled round towards the plughole. It had been two years, you’d made your choice and it wasn’t him. Not that he’d ever told you he was an option, that would have been selfish. You’d seen a way out of this life and you’d taken it. He should be happy for you, not sat here missing you, trying to remember the sound of your laughter, the way you would call him out on his excessive drinking, often stealing his drink and downing it yourself. The corner of his mouth twitched up and he let out a chuckle at the memory. Yeah, he had to face up to the facts, you were gone and at least you were safe. He couldn’t keep on wishing and missing you, wasting his life on something that never was. Gripping the edge of the counter he took a deep breath. “Enough now Dean. That’s enough.”

The road stretched away before you, the brilliant pink and orange hues of the setting sun a beautiful backdrop reminding you that if you just chased it over the horizon you would find everything you had been longing for. It was a two-day drive to the bunker, that was if you didn’t stop to eat or sleep and although that was very tempting you knew it was a stupid idea. Pulling over to the side of the road you grabbed the blanket from the backseat and tried to get comfy for a quick nap. Closing your eyes, you found your mind drifting to a familiar pair of green eyes and the soft lips of that smart mouth. In all honesty, you felt happier than you had in a long time, happier than you had any right to considering you had just walked out on your boyfriend of three years leaving him heartbroken. Your happiness was tinged with guilt and then apprehension. What if Dean and Sam weren’t there? What if Dean had met someone? What if they didn’t want you back with them? Whatever the outcome, you knew you’d done the right thing walking away from Chris, that situation wasn’t fair on either of you. Whatever was gonna happen would happen and you just had to concentrate on getting back to your boys, back to your boy.

Dean hadn’t touched so much as a beer in the past four days, something that had not gone unnoticed by Sam. Standing in his bathroom he looked in the mirror and for the first time in a while his eyes were clear and he actually looked well rested. He didn’t know how long this would last but he did know you wouldn’t want him to sit around wasting his life and there was still a big part of him that wanted to make you proud, wanted to be the man you saw in him. Rubbing his jaw, he reached for his razor, time to clean up and get on with life.

Pulling up on the deserted track it had been as if you were driving on autopilot, your body homing in on the one place it wanted to be. You were exhausted, your eyes a little bleary as you checked your reflection in the mirror. Running your fingers through your hair you were torn between making yourself look presentable and just bursting in and seeing him again. The latter won out and you pulled yourself out of the car, kicking the door closed as you took a deep breath and walked over just hoping the boys hadn’t changed the locks on you. 

Sam and Dean were sitting in the war room. Deans feet were resting lazily on the table as he read through some old comics you had once bought him and his brother scoured the internet for another case. Both looked up at each other when they heard the door opening and light footsteps descending the concrete steps. Sam reached for his gun, the brothers communicating silently, on high alert when a familiar voice called out. “Honey! I’m home!” Sam visibly relaxed, a chuckle escaping his lips as you came into view.

“We could have shot you! Why didn’t you say you were coming for a visit?” He chastised as he wrapped his arms around you in a big bear hug that brought a goofy grin to your face.

“Now where’s the fun in that?” You teased as you pulled back and looked him over. “You look like you’re actually sleeping these days, it’s a good look Sam.” Your eyes then fell on the elder Winchester who was standing awkwardly by the table, not looking directly at you. “This isn’t a visit.” Your voice was low and Dean’s eyes snapped to yours.

“You in trouble? What do you need?” He frowned, he would always drop everything in a heartbeat if you needed him.

“I need to come home. That’s if you’ll have me back.” Your eyes never left his and he nodded as he took a tentative step forward. 

“Of course sweetheart. Your old room is just as you left it.” He had so many questions but he didn’t want to push you away again, was worried this was all a dream and you’d vanish any second. 

“Turns out I left something real important behind when I went. It just took me a while to realise it.” You moved closer to him and it was as if there was nobody else in the room. Reaching out you caressed his cheek and he leaned into your touch, his eyes fluttering closed for a fraction of a second. “I don’t want to waste any more time without you, Dean.” Your voice was little more than a whisper and his eyes opened a little wide, filled with surprise and hope. 

“Then don’t.” he breathed.


End file.
